I lost my virginity when I was 15. OK, now that I got that out, let’s talk about what I did after I gave that precious gift away. I want you to know how I started over and saved myself for my future husband, battled temptation, and more than anything—how God rewrapped the gift I so willingly allowed some guy to open, step on and throw away.

Let’s start by saying this: You are a gift to your future husband. You. In totality. Not just your virginity, but your heart, emotions, thoughts, dreams and personality. Everything you are is wrapped up by God to someday present to your future husband.

Think about how much of that you want to unwrap for other guys before your future beloved enters your life. Even if you already have, you can always, always stop.

Battling Temptation
I know how hard it is to resist falling again after you’ve already blown it. Let’s face it, girls, sex is a good thing. But it’s only a good things inside of marriage. It was created to be a beautiful, pleasurable experience, and it was created for husband and wife. It may be hard to believe that when pretty much every romantic movie we watch involves couples having sex before marriage. But the fact is—it’s to be saved for marriage and marriage only.

When you’re dating someone and you feel strongly about him, it’s natural to want to cuddle. But cuddling can lead to kissing, and kissing can lead to kissing heavily . . . which can lead to regret very quickly. So how can you battle temptation?

Raising the Bar
The first way I began to battle this temptation was to have higher standards for the guys I dated. I wouldn’t date someone if I knew he wouldn’t support me in waiting until marriage. Guys who didn’t share my standards weren’t even worth my time.

They shouldn’t be worth yours, either. If you’re really serious about waiting for your future husband, don’t date a guy who isn’t serious about it, too—no matter how perfect he may seem. Remember, temptation is alluring.

Thinking About Your Future Love
Realize that your future husband exists. He is real. Think about him. I actually began a journal for him, reminding him that I was going to be faithful to him from that point forward.

It may have been heartbreaking for my husband to realize that I gave my virginity to someone else, but he felt very respected and honored by my desire and effort afterward to wait for him.

Setting Clear Sturdy Boundaries
There’s a deep longing for passion inside of us. Kissing, touching, holding hands—it feels like we need that sometimes. But the truth is—passion leads to sex.

Some people choose not to kiss until their wedding day, because they know it will lead them into temptation. Others choose to not even hold hands.

Me? Well, physical touch is my main way of receiving and expressing love. I still held hands and kissed George (my husband) when we dated. It would be really wise to talk with your mom about setting your own boundaries.

The Absolutes
Here are some “non–negotiables” that would be extremely wise to heed:

No time in the bedroom. Spending time with your boyfriend in either your bedroom or his bedroom is asking for trouble. In fact, I’d go so far as to say no alone time in any room of the house without an adult being able to see or hear you. Does that sound horrible? No privacy? It may be hard and annoying, but it is a lot safer.

And after all, this is about you protecting the gift of yourself and your future husband. Take it seriously, even if it is annoying for a while. Think about what would lead you to temptation, and stay away from those things.

Guard your heart. Your heart is just as precious as your virginity. Your emotions, your love, your thoughts and dreams are all packed inside your valuable heart. This part of you is meant for your husband as well.

I wasn’t very good at guarding my heart. I wanted to pour it into every guy I dated. I wanted to love him. Perhaps I was in love with love. Whatever the case, I poured my heart into people who were never meant to have my heart.

When you date someone, be careful not to lose yourself in a whirlwind of emotion. It’s very easy for us girls to get lost in romance. Remember that romance isn’t the only area of love. Faithfulness is a big part of love, too. Treat that as more important than experiencing a whirlwind of emotion and pouring yourself into some guy who could break your heart. Hey, faithfulness is pretty romantic, if you ask me.

Choose your friends wisely. Hanging around with people who are sexually involved or people who think waiting for the right person is stupid isn’t a good idea. Surround yourself with people who have the same ideals as you.

This could mean that some close friends are suddenly not as close, but it’s way worth it. Trust me. We tend to be easily persuaded by our friends. And even if they don’t say anything, their actions can lead us astray.

Rewrapping the Gift and Waiting
All of the things I listed above are ways I dealt with saving myself for my future husband after I’d already given myself away. But the above are also beneficial if you haven’t blown it.

If you have blown it, know this: You are a gift that has been unwrapped by the wrong person. But God can rewrap you if you let Him. He’ll help lead and guide you toward waiting for marriage. Don’t allow the gift to continue unraveling with every guy you date. Pray. Pray. Pray! Ask God to rewrap you, and then wait.

He will rewrap you. He did it for me. He rewrapped the entire package and made it even more beautiful than it was before. He also gave me a strong desire to be faithful and give my husband a new gift that wasn’t tattered, opened and abused.

Say, “I do” one day to your beloved with a gift that says, “I love you, and you were worth it.”

Ashley Weis continues to seek true beauty in Lancaster, Pa., with her husband and three children. Visit her online: www.ashleyweis.com